|System: X360, PS3, Wii, PC, PS2, PSP, DS||Review Rating Legend|
|Dev: Artificial Mind and Movement||1.0 - 1.9 = Avoid||4.0 - 4.4 = Great|
|Pub: Sega of America||2.0 - 2.4 = Poor||4.5 - 4.9 = Must Buy|
|Release: May 2, 2008||2.5 - 2.9 = Average||5.0 = The Best|
|Players: 1||3.0 - 3.4 = Fair|
|ESRB Rating: Teen||3.5 - 3.9 = Good|
Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't superheroes supposed to protect the innocent? If that is the tenant we all hold true, then this virtual version of perpetual boozehound Tony Stark may just be guilty of crimes against humanity. Yes, the sad saga continues. Another severely flawed game has been rushed to release in hopes of capitalizing on the brilliance of a blockbuster movie. It is a scenario gamers are far too familiar with, and frankly, I have had just about enough. Where the movie packed in humor, intrigue, drama, and action, this incarnation seems to lack any pulse whatsoever. Thus, the age old question, "What could have been?" is all that remains.
Following loosely in the footsteps of the movie, Iron Man, the game, makes every effort to ensure the story will make no sense whatsoever by adding as many useless plot points as possible. It is a bold move, but unfortunately it does not pay off. Sure, incorporating old enemies from Iron Man lore sounds like a good idea, but weaving them into the plot of the source material just makes for a muddled mess. It's the Spiderman 3 principle: more is not always better. Providing boss fights just for the sake of having some semblance of a climactic battle to end each stage is not necessary, particularly when a game is as annoying and repetitive as this one. Going from blasting terrorists down with one powerful shot to battling a ridiculously large tank for fifteen minutes is about as fun as watching the original Captain America movie. Believe me: it is bad.
With the premise drowning in a pool of its own stupidity, perhaps the gameplay could act as a savior to this fledgling project. Wrong! Iron Man is a button masher; plain and simple all you need to do is wail on the shoot button, and you should almost assuredly survive the countless onslaughts of randomly appearing baddies. Yes, one of the more charming gameplay quirks is the enemy who appears out of thin air. Add to that the poor collision detection, and you have got yourself the makings of something special.
Despite Ironman's uncanny ability to frustrate me, there is one interesting aspect that holds potential: the ability to earn upgrades for your slick, super, killing suit. By forcing yourself to traverse through the game, perhaps as some sort of penance for past deeds, Iron Man will continually up his arsenal. His armor, pulsor, missiles, and Gatling gun will all get progressively more efficient at wiping out the hoards of gun-toting terrorists.
Now, with that out of the way I can go back to being the old negative Tom we all know, and mostly hate. As I have stated, Iron Man is an extremely repetitive and limited experience. Couple that with its ridiculous mission objectives, which border somewhere between the lines of Superman 64 and Spiderman 2, and gamers will find very little to enjoy in this snooze fest.